lunes, noviembre 06, 2006

THE ADVENTURE OF THE CAT

Tras un largo paseo que incluía entrevistas de trabajo, ingresos en la universidad y fotos de carné para renovar mi innumerable documentación (debo ser una persona muy insegura de mi identidad... ¿Por qué llevo tantos cartoncitos en mi cartera que me dicen exactamente cómo me llamo si no...?), llego a casa pensando en gatos, trenzas, cachos de pan y otros sinsentidos. Y hete aquí que decido probar una página de "drabbles", o cuentos cortos de mil palabras. Para ser exactos, un generador de cuentos automático que me pasó cortesmente Yatsu no Tôri (recientemente añadida a mis links por su estreno de blog, ¡felicidades, linda!). Las carcajadas han sido notorias. Leed un par de ejemplos y luego resistíos a utilizar la página. Si podéis.

The Adventure Of The Cat

VHD and Mar were out for a scared Valentine's walk on the sofa. As they went, Mar rested his hand on VHD's hand. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so red, VHD was filled with round dread.

"Do you suppose it's violet here?" he asked softly.

"You sleepy silly," Mar said, tickling VHD with his sofa. "It's completely marked."

Just then, an english cat leapt out from behind a bread and dreamed Mar in the ass. "Aaargh!" Mar screamed.

Things looked angry. But VHD, although he was crafted, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a braid and, like a cursed creature with gleaming eyes, beat the cat huskily until it ran off. "That will teach you to dream innocent people."

Then he clasped Mar close. Mar was bleeding fragantly. "My darling," VHD said, and pressed his lips to Mar's eye.

"I love you," Mar said angrily, and expired in VHD's arms.

VHD never loved again.



Happy Love


Amon finished packing. Ever since Hikaru, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Amon had been cold.

There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing danced him, all was green. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going in an eucalipthus to become a round sock.

Just then, there was a furious knock at the door. Amon opened it and stood there doubiously for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his finger.

When Amon came to, Hikaru was holding his ass and looking redish. "My love," Hikaru said hardly, "I'm sorry for the scary shock. I've been shipwrecked on a sad island for the last ten years, living like a secret cautive flower in a cold winter. I was only rescued last week." She paused. "I lost my hair in the wreck. Can you still love me?"

Amon could hardly believe his Hikaru had returned. "I will always love you, hair or no hair. Besides, you can cover it up with a t-shirt."

They embraced nervously and vowed to never be parted again.

And all was wicked.

5 comentarios:

Amon dijo...

Haw haw haw haw haw

Vaya majara hizo lo de esa web XD

Iron dijo...

La gente tiene demasiado tiempo libre.
Reverenciar al friki sin vida y con granos, gracias a sus interminables horas de tedio el resto del mundo tiene minutos de felicidad.

Fourthman dijo...

!Viva el Mal!!Viva el Capital!.

El paralelísmo con la vertiente capitalista es testaruda, !sacrificar el bien ajeno para disfrutar del propio!.

Siempre habrá manos pérfidas, vitríolicas y corruptas como las de Amon que, mariconamente mediante, utilicen ésas herramientas para bombardearnos y gasear vilmente nuestras mandíbulas y lobotomizar nuestro sentido del juicio.
Las armas de mariconeo masivo ya están aquí.

Pero lo que se ríe uno.

L Gato dijo...

Amon sipped apasionadamente at his drink and stood idiota behind a moto. He was no good at parties anyhow. They always made him feel malo and he ended up like he was now, hiding and hoping nobody noticed how indecente his culo got when he was nervous.

Nada más que añadir...

Amon dijo...

x'DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD